Sunday, August 17, 2008

Spotted, Osh Hardware store on Sunset Blvd: Man. Hunched over but motoring forward with an excess of purpose. Rumpled shirt indicated a great hurry to get out of bed in the morning, and not much attention paid to the interplay between suspenders and previously mentioned shirt. These two together clues lead us to conclude that Man is driven by An Idea. Cigar hanging out of man's mouth (how do they keep them in there without periodic readjustment I just don't know), slightly gnawed, intensified this suspicion.

Almost wish I had had a cigar hanging out of my mouth at that very moment. It adds such an air of elitist snobbery, and makes one think that owner of said cigar must have somewhere very important to go later, in order to savor the experience fully.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

kona kai

Then I tasted coffee underneath my tongue and it reminded me of stomach-achey tanglewooded afternoons.
And of coffee, which I hate.

Monday, June 2, 2008


Who else thinks that Sarah Jessica Parker's hair has become unconscionably huge? Apparently it isn't enough that we have Amy Winehouse wandering around, whose hair seems to get bigger and body smaller every time she shows up in the news for a new drug arrest and/or drug snorting sighting. But really, Ms. Parker, when we start losing the face in the hair, as well as the shoulders, neck, and lapels, it's time to start looking into a new stylist, not to mention at yourself, in the mirror.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Dear China

From this page.
As Murakami would have it, after the quake.
Together with this set of photos from an australian news source.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

This Just In: Independent News Sources Pay Off

Because on this week's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me, I knew the answer to the bluff-the-listener news quiz.
Yes. The one about the lesbians.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Jonny Greenwood Mark II

Well I'll be darned if Jonny Greenwood didn't rip off Iannis Xenakis' Metastaseis just a little bit for that incredibly epic opening piece of his...where all the noise of multiple strings converges to a single note. I think Greenwood's version is called simply, There Will Be Blood. Perhaps this is not an isolated phenomenon.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

It was becuase of Brahms, wasn't it

How is it that Jonny Greenwood didn't get a best original score nomination? HMMMMM???

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Action, Reaction

Things to do at Target while your spouse is taking his/her sweet time:

1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they
aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off in 10 minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the restrooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I think we
have a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

5. Put M&M's on layaway.

6. Move "CAUTION: WET FLOOR" signs to carpeted areas.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell others that you'll only
invite them if they bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why don't
you people leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you
pretend to pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he
where the antidepressants are.

11. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission

12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different

13. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say, "PICK
ME!!!! PICK ME!!!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal
position and scream, 'NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into the fitting room and yell real loud, "Hey we're out of toilet
paper in here."